The Photoreal Subbuteo Club

THE BEGINNING

Chapter 1 - Genesis

"In the beginning, the world was without table football, and void and darkness reigned.

Then William L. Keeling did create New Footy in 1929.

And the Spirit of William L. Keeling moved upon the surface of the table, and figures were formed upon curved bases.

And there was Table Football…

And Peter Adolph saw the New Footy, and saw that it was good: And Peter Adolph did invent Subbuteo.

And Peter Adolph said, Let there be a green cloth for which to play Subbuteo upon: and it was so.

And Peter Adolph said, Let Subbuteo bring forth the Flat figure, to curl upon the green cloth: and it was so. And Peter Adolph saw every thing that he had made, and, behold, it was very good.

And there was evening and the morning.

Lo, in 1969, Peter Adolph sold the rights of Subbuteo to Waddingtons. Waddingtons, begat Hasbro, and in 2005, Hasbro did create flat photorealistic card-style figures.

A few years earlier, God did create Adam Lundy and Adam Kilgallon. Adam and Adam did play a game using the Photoreal figures. The game was without goals, and the evening and the morning saw both Adams crowned as the "Disputed Photoreal Subbuteo Champions of the World."

The experiments...

The Friends of Old Subbuteo committed to trying the Photoreal Figures out, in practice, in friendly games in the Old Sods OldSubbuteo Club and the Rochford and Southend Casual Subbuteo Club, where they faired creditably, with a mix of inspired success and dismal failure.

They were also given a run-out in the more competitive TSPA circuit, where the 13th place out of 13 entries was not to be unexpected. However, even in this reputable company, the Photoreal figures were not without promise. It became clear that while the figure were challenging to play with, they have special gifts, and with love and care, they can uplift the soul!

The clips below show some of the unique moves they can make (some legal and others less so!)

Since Subbuteo released the Photoreal figures back in 2005, no doubt there have been countless games in the living rooms of the world. To our knowledge none of the results have ever been recorded, and no official event has ever been staged.

Therefore, it is unlikely that there is a Photoreal Subbuteo World Champion. To rectify this travesty, a trophy has been made, with the help of 'Jaguar Design and Print' who made a giant figure, which sits on a Subbuteo lamp base, and trophy base from 'Trophiesr4us'.

The legitimacy of this trophy in indisputable, and it will hopefully be a zenith for Subbuteo players everywhere!

Chronicles - April 2022

c2010: Adam 'Puffin' Lundy drew a game with Adam Kilgallon. Each with one hand on the trophy.

April 2022: Fingers beat Puffin, Adam K drew with Fingers. Fingers replaces Puffin with one hand on the trophy. Adam K keeps his hand on it...

April 2022: Fingers drew with Ute, Rocket, JohnClu48, Spudksi. These 4 'Old Sods' all have a finger on the trophy...

Numbers - June 2022

June 2022: Adam draws 1-1 with Ute, and gets a tenuous finger back on the trophy, courtesy of Ute's 'trophied finger' from his draw with Fingers back in April...

Puffin's 1-0 victory replacing Finger's hand on the trophy for a Puffin wing! ?

Fingers owned by Ute, Rocket, Spudski, & JohnClu48 were prised off, as they were only there vicariously, through their draw with former disputed champion, Fingers!

Surely a showdown beckons between the 2 Adams, to become the Undisputed Old Sod, crowned the Disputed Photoreal Subbuteo World Champion!

The first regular trophy won by the Photoreals!

This was the monthly WASPA event run by Chasers Subbuteo Club (Chadwell Heath & South Essex, Romford Subbuteo)

After a creditable 1-1 draw with Gary Gladwell, with a last-minute curled shot, the chaps went from strength to strength to finish unbeaten, and astoundingly, top of the table! ?

Here they are with their trophy!

At the February TSPA event, the Photoreal Subbuteo Club High Priest, Adam 'Puffin' Lundy, played once more with Steve 'Fingers' Moreton. This time Puffin lost his wing on the trophy as Fingers' fingers once again grasped it with relish!

April saw a newcomer to the Photoreal Subbuteo Club - Kyle 'Cobra Kai Kicks' Jamieson! Having never played with these figures before, he gamely agreed to a match with Fingers, after they had both got knocked out of the Chasers Spring Open.

During the game Kyle made some spectacular saves. both posts and the crossbar were also involved, and on occasion his keeper saved without any assistance!

For such a spirited first effort, Kyle deserved all the luck, and the game finished 0-0. This means he has a finger on the trophy, with a genuine bona fide legitimate claim to be the Disputed Photoreal Subbuteo World Champion! ?

And it came to pass, that the Photoreals played in an event where they met the Chair of the English Subbuteo Association, Alan Lee.

After going 2-0 up by half-time, Alan put aside his table soccer sports figures, and joined the fray. A great commotion followed, with the trophy for the Disputed Photoreal World Champion being displayed and played for.

A very sporting gesture by Alan, to play with figures he had never used, and the reward was a very enjoyable half, with the players sharing a couple of top quality goals! 😎

At the end of 2025, the English Subbuteo Association gave permission for the Photoreals to play in the Wobbly Hobby League. This was much appreciated, and the following blog was written by the captain of the Red team.

Thanks to the ESA for allowing us the play in the Wobbly Hobby League!

…and thanks to all the players who agreed that we could play against them!

Day 1

Our very first game in a FISTF event with Brian Spoors from Glasgow, resulted in an entertaining 0-0. A few chances at either end, with some chaotic moments from ‘ping’ goal kicks and shots on the fly. Brian went close a few times, and also openly admitted to some ‘balls-ups’ when looking to set up the final shot. We have to admit we were relieved to get a result in our first game. The commentator (who is actually the person who flicks us about) said “It’s tough to play a game when you only have possession for 3 or 4 seconds at a time”. Brian’s response “Yes, but for those 3 or 4 seconds it’s bloody terrifying!”

We were so buzzing with this game that we totally forgot we were playing again, and admittedly lost our focus. We turned up with seconds to spare – no warm-up, no team talk, no nothing!

Dave Lauder from Cardiff kicked off and took us to school. After 2 mins and 30 seconds we were 3-0 down! The next 12 minutes was mostly a desperate rearguard attempt to keep the score down, and we managed to keep Dave at bay. After he scored again in the dying seconds, we were promptly substituted for someone who was actually ready to play!

Game 3 – We were not surprised to be left on the bench for the Surrey game. But at least we managed to avoid playing Simon Goodman, who knows our unique style only too well! The Gaffer gave us a run out at half-time with the task of overturning a 3-goal deficit playing Lee Fenton, who’d come on for Simon Goodman. We had joy, we had fun, but mostly we got done! …by conceding a couple more. This Wobbly Hobby League is turning out to be a tough gig!

Then, an unexpected opportunity to play a half with Graham Harwood. He played with our blue Photoreal team for a spinning extravaganza! The blues were victorious with a well-taken goal. Near the end there was a spectacular shot against the post that deserved to be the equalizer! Our commentator was also the cameraman for this, so we apologise for any dodgy flicking and substandard camerawork, but nevertheless, here are the highlights…

And then – an unexpected pleasure, when we were drawn to play Alan Lee in the match with Stanway, and Alan agreeing to play with the blue team. So it was a Photoreal extravaganza!

We all relaxed into the game and for some reason, the moves worked and the shooting was on target, and it was a somewhat bemused Alan who took another kick-off, 3-0 down after 8 minutes!

But our blue comrades then found their stride, as the ESA Chairman started to work out the magic of the Photoreal figures. With the last shot of the half, the blues almost equalised! At half-time it was 3-2, and everyone took a few minutes to catch their breath…

The bonkersness continued into the 2^nd half, with great moves, accurate shots and four more goals. At 6-2 down Alan played 1-1-8, and the last 5 minutes was a non-stop goal-mouth scramble. He could have scored 5 and won 7-6, but lucky for us, a few shots hit the woodwork and we held on to a 6-3 win. We give our testament that never before in the history of the Photoreal movement has a game been played to such a high standard and resulted in a 9-goal thriller.

So that was the end of the group stages and we found ourselves in something called Division 2. And not only that, but the games were also to start today!

First up, Steve Wonnacott of Bristol. And fresh from our goal-fest, we had an early chance where his defender was up against the ball, half-blocking it. *Bosh!* *Loop!*, *Nestle!*, and we were 1-0 up! We said it was a lucky goal, but Steve said it wasn’t, reminding us that you have to get the pace right for those type of shots. Nice to play with players who show their appreciation when the other team plays well. Just before half-time Steve equalised after some fairly solid pressure, and the game was pretty open through the second half. Then we did some defending, ridden with 00-scale muppetry, and Steve scored the winner. Nice game, we were disappointed with the result but philosophically realistic that the better team had won.

Surely, that was the end of the day and we could have a well-deserved lie down in our box (specially designed by John Turpin). But no! One more Division 2 game, and a rematch with Surrey, where Joe Parody volunteered to play the game with us. He’d been watching our game with Alan Lee and fancied a closer Photoreal experience. Respect to Joe! On reflection, maybe we showed Joe too much respect initially, as after 3 minutes we were 2-0 down! “Here we go again!” our goalkeeper said. Our centre-back replied “This division 2 malarkey is hard work!”. But this time we dug deep, despite it being way passed our bedtime, we hung on in there. After we got one back, the rest of the game was quite open and it was a surprise there were no more goals at either end. The final whilst, and grins all round. Now for a sleep and dreaming of day 2!

A game with Mr Patterson has the effect of raising our game, and for once no defending blunders and some prolonged periods of possession meant we were in the game throughout. We all concentrated and gave 110%, with a mixture of effort and nervous energy as Rob got up to all his tricks, from years of experience. One tactic threw us completely, when he put 4 players in our defending area, in a sort of funnel shape, when he had a goal kick. “No problems” said our goalie “There all offside”. Then as the ball was careering to this funnel, the goalie then said: “no wait, it’s from a goal-kick! They’re all onside!”

After hanging on for grim death for 29 minutes and 58 seconds, we suddenly has a chance for a shot on goal. 2 seconds later, Rob had extended his hand to commend us on our 1-0 victory. An amazing experience, and one we will always remember as our finest hour!

Now, we were unbeatable, or so we thought…! Colchester was the next game and we were matched with Jamie Warren. Jamie was a little reticent to play against us, but with some encouragement from Adz, he graciously agreed. What he found out in the next 15 minutes is that he had nothing to worry about, and what we found out is his chip-shots from an angle are exemplary. 3-0 down at half time, and the call went out to Shell to replace us. From ‘Heros’ to ‘Zeros’. Talk about being taken to school… by a schoolboy!

Our last 2 games were with Kent Flickers and a club that goes by the name of Rochford and Southend Casuals - allegedly shorted to RAScals!

First up was the young Hadley from Kent. Clearly a youngster with talent and promise, we soon discovered. We showed neither fear nor favour and got into the game with our trademark merciless demeanour, and scored a wonder goal, with our centre back running the length of the pitch, through an impossible gap and smacking the ball in the top right!

We didn't feel any guilt. Ok we felt some guilt! Our penance was to experience yet another quality chip-shot from a schoolboy! So 1-1, and honour was satisfied.

So now to the local Essex derby with RAS...

...and who better to finish with than Stewart (Youbutteo) Grant! The statistics say it was a boring 0-0. OK, it was 0-0, but the clips below suggest it was anything than boring!

The ref (Rob Fitch) was great, letting the game flow and uttering such judgements as: "F*** knows!" He also doubled up as cameraman and spectator/supporter, which compromised his official role somewhat...."Sorry, just realised I should be refereeing - I was just watching!"

What a great way to end our Wobbly Hobby experience! 😅